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UtILItY WeeK | 7th - 13th November 2014 | 31 Community Disconnector Editor: ellen bennett, t: 01342 332084, e: ellen.bennett@fav-house.com; News editor: Jillian Ambrose, t: 01342 332061, e: jillian.ambrose@fav-house.com; Associate news editor: mathew beech, t: 01342 332082, e: mathew.beech@fav-house.com; Energy correspondent: Joyeeta Basu, t: 01342 332110, e: joyeeta.basu@fav-house.com; Insights editor: Jane Gray, t: 01342 332087, e: jane.gray@fav-house.com; Research analyst: vidhu Dutt, t: 01342 332026, e: vidhu.dutt@fav-house.com; Production editor: Paul Newton, e: paul.newton@ fav-house.com; Business development manager: ed roberts, t: 01342 332067, e: ed. roberts@fav-house.com; Sales executive: hayley Cronin, t: 01342 332077, e: hayley.cronin@ fav-house.com; Publisher: Amanda barnes, e: amanda.barnes@fav-house.com. General enquiries: 01342 332000; Subscriptions: UK £577 per year, overseas £689 per year, t: 020 8955 7045. ISSN: 1356-5532. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office. Printed by: buxton Press, Palace road, buxton, Derbyshire SK17 6Ae. Published by: Faversham house Ltd, Windsor Court, Wood Street, east Grinstead, West Sussex rh19 1UZ Monkey business It's enough to turn a man to drink. Disconnector is pondering the latest attempt by an energy company to try to get customers to 'feel the love', this time with the aid of a computer-generated orangutan. Meet Maya (yup, of course they gave it a name), the star of a series of posters and videos from SSE as it tries to persuade customers of its environmental and ethical credentials, as well as the miraculous job it does in providing the electricity that modern man needs to run his civilisations (cue the monkey strolling around a brightly-lit city at night marvelling at the escalators and neon signs). The reaction from the media has not been, erm, kind. Even the New Statesman felt com- pelled to ask, not unreason- ably, "Why the hell is there a sad orangutan in the Scottish and Southern Energy adverts?" (Answer: it's not sad, it's wistful). While The Guardian condemned the campaign as "deeply manipulative", showing that it had yet to grasp what the advertising industry is there for. Unfortunately, the responses from the denizens of Twitter aren't printable. SSE should be applauded for trying to present its best side to the great unwashed, but the monkey is a stretch. A bit like a man on a dating site posting pictures of himself holding pup- pies, it's just trying too hard. Disconnector People want accurate, timely bills, a price they think is fair and a customer service opera- tion that will handle faults and complaints quickly and with minimum fuss. Orangutans may make us go all gooey and fuzzy with their big sad eyes and human-like melancholy, but energy companies never will. This is going to cost you The papers aren't going to have any truck with monkeys strolling through London as a metaphor for the heroic work energy companies do in keeping the lights on – not when they can run stories of old ladies being threatened with disconnection or vicars receiving bailiffs' letters for bills they haven't run up. Even when they try to be helpful, things too easily go awry. For example, if the owner- ship or tenancy of a property supplied by British Gas changes, the supplier sends the new occu- pier an estimate of the next 12 months' likely energy bills based on the usage of the previous occupant. This gives potential customers the information they need to make an informed choice. If they don't like the numbers, they can look around for an alternative supplier. Except that last week the owner of a three-bedroomed house in Spalding, Lincolnshire, received an estimate for the year ahead of £53,000. That is the sort of bill associated with a 140-bed hotel. To be fair, The Daily Telegraph reported that the couple were more bemused than alarmed, and a phone call sorted everything out. Appar- ently the previous occupant had given "an incorrect meter reading" when they moved out. But Disconnector finds it staggering that the billing sys- tem doesn't flag up incongrui- ties like projecting a bill for a domestic dwelling at 53 grand. Cue picture of sad-eyed orangutan staring out of frame holding an energy bill… Turn those lights out! If British Gas can be accused of shooting itself in the foot, spare a thought for poor National Grid, which was roasted by the Mail Online for keeping the lights lit all night at its headquarters "days aer warning our bulbs could be dimmed this winter due to energy crisis". In fact, the transmission operator issued no such warning. In its Winter Outlook it said margins this winter were lower than last, so it was bringing more backup capacity online and signing up some big industrial users on interruptible contracts, just in case. As a last resort, National Grid will lower voltage rather than leave sections of the country without loss, but that is true at any time of year. Oh, and the reason it keeps the lights on at its HQ? It runs a 24-hour operation from the centre. It needs the lights on. 3,580 Average circulation Jan–Dec 2013 Subscriptions: UK £577 per year, overseas £689 per year fhcustomerservices@ abacusemedia.com Jennifer Webber @jennifercwebber And today's news is that windfarms don't have a load factor of 100 per cent. Who knew? Julie Elliott MP @JulieElliottMP Defra admits it's made no estimate of how much arable land is taken up by solar and how much this policy will cut solar capacity Katie Mack @AstroKatie ppl assume that tweeting about global warm- ing means I'd like to debate climate science with them. This is not, in fact, the case. Mathew Beech @beechams1042 A tweet from @LibDemPress on @Edward- DaveyMP keeping the lights on made me think of him in a giant hamster wheel hooked up to the grid… Lib Dem Press Office @LibDemPress @beechams1042 @EdwardDaveyMP We can neither confirm or deny that such a plan exists. Vicky Ellis @ELNVicky Cordi O Hara says "the generation picture started to deteriorate in summer", with unexpected power plant closures. Ofgem @ofgem @nationalgriduk Cordi O'hara: New balancing services will enable National Grid to manage tighter margins. #ngwinteroutlook Andy Colthorpe @pv_techandy I thought we don't use UK farmland for food cos it's grown cheaper elsewhere. How does curtailing #solar farms help? Emily Gosden @emilygosden So we should hope it's warm and windy this winter and EDF fixes its nukes on time. Then we'll be fine. Probably. If no more fires. Guy Shrubsole @guyshrubsole Let's stop those dastardly solar farms using up valuable cropland! Er, except Defra has no idea what their impact is. Peter Campbell @Petercampbell1 National Grid leaves lights on at its HQ – days after warning of dimmed lights all over the UK. Top Tweets