Utility Week

Utility Week 14 03 14

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UtILItY WEEK | 14th - 20th March 2014 | 31 Community Disconnector Editor: Ellen Bennett, t: 01342 332084, e: ellen.bennett@fav-house.com; Energy editor: Megan Darby, t: 01342 332087, e: megan.darby@fav-house.com; Features editor: Karma Ockenden, t: 01342 332086, e: karma.ockenden@fav-house. com; Reporter: Mathew Beech, t: 01342 332082, e: mathew.beech@fav-house.com; Reporter: Conor McGlone, t: 01342 332083, e: conor.mcglone@fav-house.com; Production editor: Paul Newton, t: 01342 332085; Business development manager: Ed Roberts, t: 01342 332067, e: ed.roberts@fav-house.com; Sales executive: Nicky Shaw, t: 01342 332070, e: nicky.shaw@fav-house.com; Publisher: amanda Barnes, e: amanda.barnes@fav-house.com. General enquiries: 01342 332000; Subscriptions: UK £577 per year, Overseas £689 per year, t: 01342 332011. ISSN: 1356-5532. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office. Printed by: Buxton Press, Palace Road, Buxton, Derbyshire SK17 6AE. Published by: Faversham house Ltd, Windsor court, Wood Street, East Grinstead, West Sussex rh19 1UZ Sole searching… Disconnector was a little non- plussed to receive a press release from a British company called Rock Fall proudly announc- ing the launch of the "world's first exclusively designed range of women's safety footwear". Safety footwear is safety foot- wear, or at least so the great man assumed. Other than making boots in smaller sizes, what else could qualify them as made for women, while also qualifying them as safety footwear? Safety sandals, maybe? Surely not. The press company claimed the new range had not only been sized for women but "shaped specifically to female feet". Disconnector does not pretend to be any expert on the matter, but are women's feet not, er, foot-shaped? He's pretty sure they are. Hmm. This is a marketing ploy that hasn't been thought through. Neither has the name of the range: Vixen. Now there's a brand dreamt up by a man, and he was probably confus- ing "good name for shoes" with "good name for a dominatrix". For the record, the diction- ary describes a vixen as either a female fox or a quarrelsome woman, neither of which pre- sents an appealing image to ordi- nary women in the workplace. Not so quiet One woman who definitely can't be described as ordinary is Bjork, the elfin-looking Icelandic Disconnector popstress whose unearthly war- bling used to grace – nay, dis- turb – many a dinner party back in the day. Her heart was always in the right place, even if much of the new age philosophy she espoused was gobbledegook. So, it was with something of a pang of nostalgia that Discon- nector learnt that the diminu- tive former Sugarcubes front woman has not let the years dim her unfocused rage against the machine. She is spearheading a campaign called Stopp!, which is aiming to prevent Iceland from exploiting its geothermal resources and selling the result- ing power to countries such as the UK through a proposed interconnector. Bjork and her mates are outraged that Ice- land's beautifully bleak volcanic landscape should be scarred by anything as vulgar as a geother- mal power plant. It would not disturb the local puffins much, one imagines, but it would cer- tainly spoil the view of any pop star who had happened to buy a mansion nearby. It looks like it doesn't matter which renewable technology it is, how inhospitable the sur- roundings, or how much we want to save the planet, we still don't want the things in our own back yard. The ice virus cometh Global warming has become the ideal bogeyman for our times. Much as 1950s sci-fi paranoia about alien invasions reflected American concerns at the time about communist infiltration, so climate change seems a deserved Nemesis for our gluttony with the world's resources. All well and good, I hear you say, but slow-moving climate change is no substi- tute for the Creature from the Black Lagoon. Wrong. This from the Daily Mail last week: "Scientists revive 30,000 year old 'giant virus' from Siberian permafrost." Yup, it turns out that rising global temperatures have been thawing out previously inac- cessible permafrost. A scientific survey undertaken by Russia and France uncovered a prehis- toric virus frozen in the ground. Obviously unfamiliar with the films of John Carpenter, the sci- entists decided not to incinerate the thing or call in an instant nuclear strike, but try to revive it to see what happened. Revive it they did (hooray!), much to the astonishment of their fellow scientists (double hooray!) and it came back to life but turned out not to be able to infect lifeforms cur- rently alive on Earth (TFFT!). So there you have it: the planet will either boil, freeze, be torn apart by storms or turned into a desert. Or – and this is the one Disconnector is rooting for – the melting ice will reveal some hibernating menace which through our own hubris we will bring back to life and it will kill us all. It's a lot more satisfying ending, don't you think? 3,580 Average circulation Jan–Dec 2013 Subscriptions: UK £577 per year, Overseas £689 per year fhcustomerservices@ abacusemedia.com Thomas Steward @Steward_T DECC consult on weakening ECO (only demand reduction policy that's working). Sorry Ed, not sure that's an 'improvement' Bryony Worthington @bryworthington RES to stop work on dedicated biomass plant. This Gov only interested in most costly forms of low carbon? EMR too uncertain for investors Richard Hall @richonlyinname DECC cools expectations of fast progress in creating a national network hotline; "the implementation of the NHS 111 number took five years" Daz @reapthewildwind Finally got OFGEM accreditation for our Orkney wind turbine. Might even get paid... There's a thought. #ShowMeTheMoney Jon Z Bentley @JonZBentley Fascinating mix of views and opinions at #city2014 @WaterUKEvents between inves- tors, industry and regulators... Not always 100% aligned Will Andrews Tipper @AndrewsTipper ECO consultation states the new SWI target is "slightly consistent" with 2013 delivery levels. Elegant euphemism for "massively lower than"? Will Ray @sustainawill DECC considering QR codes on bills shows how far behind their thinking on consumers is. Nobody uses them! Energy Boss @EnergyBossMan Further to the @DECCgovuk QR code initiative, we will be sending out commemorative minidiscs. More details on our Bebo page Emily Gosden @emilygosden Straw poll: who uses QR codes? DECC wants them on energy bills to help people switch but also admits QR 'at risk of short-term obsolescence' Zoe Leader @Zoe_WWF Govt own impact assessment shows 14,000 jobs to be lost due to changes to ECO – so unnecessary Top Tweets

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