Utility Week

Community media storm broke she called him and was sure it was him who picked up the phone but then someone else came on the line "pretending to be Chinese". It's comedy gold, and what higher qualification for PM can there be in an internet age where you can be forgiven for anything except being dull? Not Boris's bag It's not been a good week for PR advisers. First, Prince Andrew decided to address accusations of sexual misconduct by giving a no- holds-barred interview, which far from calming the waters has added petrol to the fire (against the advice of his senior PR man, it should be noted). Then, Boris Johnson released a campaign video in which his efforts to por- tray himself as an ordinary Joe saw him make a cup of tea but put the milk in before removing the tea bag. Social media quickly dubbed it Tea-gate – what sort of brew would result from that unholy sequencing of tea-making? As Utility Week goes to press, the country awaits the first head-to-head TV debate between Johnson and Jeremy Corbyn in what it has widely been decided is an act of hubris on Johnson's part. A‹er all, he's terrible at TV debates and has little to gain since he's so far ahead in the polls anyway. Disconnector Publishing director, Utilities: Ellen Bennett, t: 01342 332084, e: ellenbennett@fav-house.com; Content director: Jane Gray, janegray@fav-house.com, t: 01342 333004; Editor: Suzanne Heneghan, t: 01342 332106, e: suzanneheneghan@fav-house.com Digital editor: James Wallin, 01342 332015, jameswallin@fav-house.com; Intelligence editor: Denise Chevin, 01342 332087, denisechevin@fav-house.com Energy correspondent: Tom Grimwood, t: 01342 332061, e: tomgrimwood@fav-house.com; Policy correspondent: David Blackman, e: davidblackman@ fav-house.com; Reporter: Adam John, t: 01342 332069, e: adamjohn@fav-house.com; Water correspondent: Ruth Williams, e: ruthwilliams@fav-house.com, t: 01342 332069 Production editor: Paul Newton, t: 01342 332085, e: paulnewton@fav-house.com; Business development manager: Ben Hammond, e: benhammond@fav-house.com. t: 01342 332116; Business development executive: Sarah Wood, e: sarahwood@fav-house.com. t: 01342 332117 Conference sponsorship manager: Sophie Abbott, t: 01342 332062, e: sophieabbott@fav-house.com; General enquiries: 01342 332000; Membership enquiries: Peter Bissell, t: 01342 332057, e: peterbissell@fav-house.com. 2,500 Average circulation Jan–Dec 2018 Membership subscriptions: UK £950+VAT per year. Contact Jo Nikiforov on: 01342 332077 Utility Week is a member of the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO), the regulator of the UK's magazine and newspaper industry. We abide by the Editors' Code of Practice and are committed to upholding the highest standards of journalism. If you think we have not met those standards and want to make a complaint, please contact the Editor. If we are unable to resolve your complaint, or if you want more information about IPSO or the Editors' Code, contact IPSO on 0300 123 2220 or visit www.ipso.co.uk. we'd all have cheap bread, right? Like they do in Venezuela. But for now, the utilities sec- tor will just have to take comfort from the fact that it has been joined by telecoms, rail and bus services in Labour's line against the wall. Who knows, if you're far enough down the queue they may have run out of bullets by the time your turn comes. It's for you Maybe it's because three years of arguing over Brexit has le‹ everyone exhausted, but the level of serious debate in this election doesn't seem, well, all that serious. Despite the current arms race of spending pledges between the two main parties, few issues are getting any lasting traction. The Tories are doing their best, for instance screaming that Labour's plans would cost ONE TRILLION POUNDS! But despite this, the biggest story of the week, so far as Boris Johnson is concerned, has been a series of interviews by British media outlets with US business- woman Jennifer Arcuri, the entre- preneur and one-time compan- ion of then London mayor Boris Johnson. She is still refusing to confirm they were actual lovers but has expressed her fury that Johnson won't pick up the phone to her, despite their long-term "very close" relationship. She claims that once the Broadly speaking General elections can be fraught for utilities. For ten years, aus- terity has been the watchword, which puts the focus on the cost of living, which points the finger at utility bills. Politicians wanting an easy win simply blamed "fat cats" and "broken markets" and declared "something must be done". The last election resulted in the Conservatives promising an energy price cap to see off Labour calls for nationalisation of the sector. Utility chiefs must surely have been fearing more of the same this time, but thus far the fates have been kinder. The main parties have dis- covered that there is a magic money tree a‹er all and auster- ity is officially over. There's so much public money sloshing around that energy and water bills have fallen off the radar. Nationalisation is still on the cards under Labour, of course, but even here energy and water have become yesterday's news – the new kid on the block is broadband telecoms. Who saw that com- ing? If they're worried about the poor having access to the essentials of life, Disconnector doesn't know why the com- rades don't go the whole hog and nationalise the production of bread. That would mean UTILITY WEEK | 22ND - 28TH NOVEMBER 2019 | 31 But Disconnector thinks fears of a terrible debate are overblown. Boris has lost every one he's ever done but still won the subsequent election. It's not the stumbling TV appearances or the pole- dancing companions that elicit a flicker of worry in the eyes of his supporters. But that video of him sloshing milk into his tea, the bag still in… that could be a reason to doubt his judgement. A meeting of minds In research that will surprise no-one, academics at the University of Malmo in Sweden have concluded that meetings generate few decisions despite their frequency increasing. Professor Patrik Hall led the probe into the fact that the number of meetings seems to be going up despite people declaring them to be a waste of time. He revealed: "Many managers don't know what to do, and when they are unsure of their role, they respond by generating more meetings." Other conclusions were that "people don't do concrete things any more" and that "self-promoters at work do nothing but still get ahead". It's a shocking indictment of modern working practices – and if that's not worthy of a meeting, Disconnector doesn't know what is.

• Cover