Utility Week

Community Floating in a tin can Nothing demonstrates human kind's mastery of the universe as much as our ability to put a man in space, but even in orbit around the Earth there's no escaping incompetence. Disconnector muses thus on recent news that an air leak was discovered on the Inter national Space Station. It was eventually traced to a 2mm hole in a Soyuz capsule and at first was assumed to be the result of a miniature mete oroid strike. On closer inspec tion, however, it was obvious someone had drilled a hole. Conspiracy theorists imme diately latched on to deliberate sabotage, perhaps by a psy chotically deranged astronaut. The more plausible explana tion is that it was done either during construction or during testing at the Baikonur cosmo drome in Kazakhstan. Accord ing to this theory a worker may have mistakenly drilled a hole in the side of the hull and then effected a temporary repair rather than own up. Once the sealant dried up and floated away, hey presto, air leak! It occurs to Disconnector that if they want to make the next Star Wars more realistic, then at Luke Skywalker's show down with the baddie they should have him trip over a toolbox le by some idiot when the Death Star was in dry dock. X marks the spot As regular readers will know, the great man is a keen observer of Planet X – the muchspeculated about hid den planet that lies beyond the outer fringes of the solar system. Or rather, since noone has actually observed Planet X (because it isn't there), the great man is a keen observer of those who say they observe Planet X. Sometimes referred to as Planet Nine, it is reckoned to be four times the size of Earth and ten times the mass, but invisible to our telescopes. It nonetheless gets a lot of scientists excited, and not just the ones with postal degrees; those with actual university qualifications, too. Planet Nine was first theorised by experts at Caltech in 2016 and now has been backed up by experts at the University of Michigan. They submitted a paper claiming to have detected a large, icy body on the outskirts of the solar system with a strange orbit. The only explanation, they conclude, is that it must be in the thrall of a large, hitherto undetected, planet – Planet Nine. The theory is not only unlikely but dull, thinks the great man. If you're going to believe in a large, invisible planet then the gold standard remains Nibiru, revealed to the world in 1995 by Nancy Lieder (not a scientist). Nibiru is unde tectable because it's on the opposite side of the sun, and when it does eventually hove into view, it will be because it's on a collision course with Earth. If this were the movies, Bruce Willis would be sent to intercept it, although in Dis connector's version he would quickly discover an inexplica ble air leak in his space cra… Red and dead If you're a traditionalist you don't need Planet X hurtling through the void to spell our doom. There's always the Bible. One of the signs of impend ing Armageddon is the birth of a "red heifer" and, apparently, a red calf was indeed born in Israel last week, the first for 2,000 years. The Temple Institute in Jerusalem must now determine whether the calf "brings the promise of reinstating Biblical purity to the world". On the plus side, maybe a dose of Biblical purity will at least end the interminable purgatory of Brexit. Disconnector Publishing director, Utilities: Ellen Bennett, t: 01342 332084, e: ellenbennett@fav-house.com; Acting editor: Suzanne Heneghan, t: 01342 332106, e: suzanneheneghan@fav-house.com Acting content director: Denise Chevin, 01342 332087, denisechevin@fav-house.com; Deputy editor: Jane Gray (maternity leave); Features editor: Lois Vallely, t: 01342 332080, e: loisvallely@fav-house.com; News editor: Katey Pigden, t: 01342 332082, e: kateypigden@ fav-house.com; Content editor: Alice Cooke, t: 01342 332102, e: alicecooke@fav-house.com; Energy correspondent: Tom Grimwood, t: 01342 332061, e: tomgrimwood@fav-house.com; Policy correspondent: David Blackman, e: davidblackman@fav-house.com; Reporter: Adam John, t: 01342 332069, e: adamjohn@fav-house.com; Business development manager: Ben Hammond, e: benhammond@fav-house.com. t: 01342 332116; Business development executive: Sarah Wood, e: sarahwood@ fav-house.com. t: 01342 332117 Conference sponsorship manager: Sophie Abbott, t: 01342 332062, e: sophieabbott@ fav-house.com; General enquiries: 01342 332000; Membership enquiries: Peter Bissell, t: 01342 332057, e: peterbissell@fav-house.com. ISSN: 1356-5532. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office. 2,500 Average circulation Jan–Dec 2017 Membership subscriptions: UK £769+VAT per year. Overseas £781 per year. Contact Peter Bissell on: 01342 332057 Utility Week is a member of the Independent Press Standards Organisation (which regulates the UK's magazine and newspaper industry). We abide by the Editors' Code of Practice and are committed to upholding the highest standards of journalism. If you think that we have not met those standards and want to make a complaint please contact the publishing director, Ellen Bennett, at ellenbennett@fav-house.com. If we are unable to resolve your complaint, or if you would like more information about IPSO or the Editors' Code, contact IPSO on 0300 123 2220 or visit www.ipso.co.uk UTILITY WEEK | 14TH - 20TH SEPTEMBER 2018 | 31 Dustin Benton @dustin_benton So, I'm at the #ZEVsummit. Grayling's speech says 'there's much more to do to make ZEV motoring happen.' Quite. Matt Finch @mattfinch00 Portuguese environment minister stressing the need for ambition when it comes to #ElectricVehicle rollout. He's sat next to a British minister partly responsible for setting the 2040 no combustion sales date - which is NOT ambitious..... #ZEVsummit Jon Ferris @fractalgrid Green number plates 'could boost sales of electric cars' in UK. If only energy efficiency and heating could be made as visible as EVs and solar roofs. Adam Boorman @AdamBoorman Just going to leave this here - From Ofgem's price cap doc "While the cap is in place, we think it likely that switching rates will be lower than today's levels (absent other changes)" William Marchant @richonlyinname The most telling finding of Ofgem's consumer challenge panels on attitudes to price caps is this one: that a price cap probably won't change consumer behaviour. The engaged are likely to stay engaged. The disengaged are likely to stay disengaged. Duncan Carter @Duncan_E_Carter So £996 is Ofgem benchmark cost for an efficient supplier...does this mean suppliers offering tariffs below this level are loss leading and unsustainable? Why does Ofgem and others persist in comparing SVT to loss leading tariffs as this is a misleading comparison. Jonathan Graham @enerjg Just realised the EU ETS and carbon price support are giving a UK 'total carbon price' of £38/tonne, £14 above the intended 'floor'. And HMT froze CPS rates until April 2021. When will the pressure start on HMT to review CPS rates yet again? Richard Howard @UKenergywonk The recent rise in carbon and gas prices pushed average GB power prices to £59.5/MWh in August 2018 - a 45% increase on last August, and the highest August prices for a decade! Top Tweets

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